Taking kids to story time can be a lovely respite from the daily grind of being a parent. It's an effective way to help your child love books, reading, increase their literacy and to see the library as an amazing resource. But if you've been following this blog for any length of time (Hurray! You are awesome!) I am preaching to the converted. However, let's be honest. It's not always the serene and peaceful mid-day break we hope it will be.
I've been a library story time volunteer for about two years now. I took my own kids off and on to free story time activities at the library and other venues with varying degrees of success. As a parent, a lot of the success of a story time trip has to do with both the type of event and the personality of the child. But chances are, both you and your child can have a great time.
Recently, on my Facebook page I suggested that parents stay off their phones and stop chatting to each other during story time. I got a lot of "Here! Here!"s, but I did get a wee bit of pushback. I get it, you are a weary parent or caregiver. You want a break! I argue you can have a break AND be a respectful story time attendee. Here are the Dos and Don'ts of Story Time, based on my experience as a volunteer and as a parent.
DO:
- Feed your child before story time. Need I say more?
- Arrive early. Our library gives out tickets which go quickly, but even if that is not the case, it is very hard on the story time leader to have late arrivals straggle in.
- PARTICIPATE. This is a big one for me. I know you are tired, I get that you might not want to sing "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" for the umpteenth time today. Your child is watching you. If the librarian or volunteer asks you to stand up for "Head Shoulders Knees and Toes" and you don't do so, your child learns it's okay not to listen when adults ask them to do something. (Yes, you may be attending to your child and can't do something - no problem, but otherwise....) I get that some adults may feel silly, but I assure you, you look way less silly as a participant than when you sit on the sidelines. So, clap those hands!
- Model respectful behavior. Amy of Sunlit Pages wrote in her post, A Pet Peeve of Mine, or Why Parents are a Big Fat Bunch of Hypocrites:
... we expect our kids to be still and quiet when we take them to adult events (church or wedding receptions or funerals), but we think we don't have to be still and quiet at their activities. We are setting a very poor example, and they are paying attention to it.
I could not agree more.
- Let your child approach the story teller. For me personally, and others may disagree, when kids try and put their noses in the book, point to everything on the page, or even turn the page, I can handle it. So far, I've been able to hold the book up higher than any 3 year old can reach if necessary. On the other hand, if the child seems to be particularly intrusive, set him on your lap.
- Help clean up, if the opportunity arises. This may not apply to all story times, but we have toy time at the end so parents and caregivers can hang out for a little while. I always appreciate the help putting the toys away.
- Thank the librarian or volunteer! Most people do this and I love saying goodbye to the kids.
- Make it a regular event if you can. The more you go, the easier it will be and the more your kids will get out of it.
- Check out books before you go home. Congratulations. You just enjoyed a free story time activity! Most libraries get funding partly based on circulation numbers. Checking out books is not only good for you, it's a way to give back to the library.
DON'Ts:
- Don't worry if your child isn't paying attention. In my experience, kids don't regularly pay attention to the books until about age 3. I don't care if kids wander the room, roll around on the floor, inspect my shoes, or any other number of activities!
- Don't look at your cell phone. Not even one little bit. Refer to my advice above about participating and modeling respectful behavior. My mother took me to story time before cell phones and she survived. Are you taking photos? Okay, you can do that.
- Don't talk to your neighbor. I get it. You are so excited to be in a room with other adults! YAY! Chat with them before story time, get a cup of coffee after story time. When I'm reading a book and the adults are chatting it is incredibly frustrating. DO talk to your child when you need to (I don't think parents need to shush their children. It's okay if kids want to talk, but follow the lead of your story teller), but try to keep it quiet.
- Don't bring snacks. Snacks are trouble. Snacks make crumbs. Snacks make work for others. Feed your child beforehand.
- Don't forget that librarians work hard and that volunteers are giving of their free time to bring you a FREE event. Treat them the way you would want to be treated. Better yet, treat them the way you want your children to treat others.
Librarians and volunteers love having full rooms of kids eager to read books, sing songs, recite rhymes and have fun. I hope your local library has a story time that works for you. If not, why not approach your children's librarian and offer to help out! I'm sure they would appreciate it!
Are you a librarian or story teller? What tips would you add to this list? What is the key that you have found for a successful story time? I'd love to learn from you!
Parents, what are your tips? Do you go to local story times?
MORE: Looking to take your library visits to the next level? You must check out our library challenge!
Grace says
Well said! I am a Children's Librarian. I have stopped reading during story times to ask parents to model the behaviour they expect from their children. It seems to me that for some, a story time is like plunking a kid down in front of a screen - no interaction required. It helps if the person telling the story lets them know the expectations! Thank you for getting the point across so politely!
Erica MomandKiddo says
Thanks, Grace! I did try to keep it positive, because I don't want parents to be turned off story time. It's only 30 minutes and a little common curtesy goes a long way!
melanie hope greenberg says
I agree with your suggestions. As a visiting author I see exactly what you are talking about. Also, don't allow the children to get behind the reader and upstage the reading. If the child cries take them out of the room to soothe them.
Erica MomandKiddo says
Yes, the "let your kid wander" advice should definitely be limited to the child not upstaging the reader!
:Donna says
This is fantastic, Erica, and I could NOT agree with you more here! The biggest trouble is that many parents, in many ways, have become lazy and somehow either expect others to be "dealing with" their children, or there's the "let kids be free no matter WHERE they are" (God forbid they're restricted or disciplined) mentality--OR BOTH. I've never had tolerance for any of it, to be truthful.
Erica MomandKiddo says
Well the flip side is that I don't want parents to feel they can't come to story time just because their kids will not sit still for 30 minutes. I have two children who never sat for story time and I was fortunate that we were still welcome.
Val says
From a volunteer—I agree completely. Wandering is fine, but siblings who fight at home should not be allowed to use story time stuffed toys or manipulables to hit one another during story time even though it is ok at home. It sets behavior patterns for every other child in the group. Suddenly chaos reins!
Susan Stephenson says
As a Storytime at the Library volunteer, I really appreciate when a parent removes a screaming child. It distresses the other kids and makes the read-aloud almost impossible, so I am relieved when parents do this. It's only happened twice and the second time, Mum gave an ultimatum and kept to it. So it was quick, we tied a knot and moved on. I also love when my parents join in - we do lots of physical activity and the kids love when parents stamp, clap and shake their tail feathers too.
My key is probably book choice and flexibility. The second part comes in when I choose a wonderful book but that day is mostly toddlers and the particular book won't work for them. I always have spare books prepared just in case!
Erica MomandKiddo says
Yes, I find most parents are good about removing a really disruptive child. Good tips about flexibility. So important when there are kids involved.
ChristyM says
I would add, if you are having trouble finding story times, walk into the library and ask for a paper copy of the schedule. Often they aren't listed on-line.
Erica MomandKiddo says
Good tip!
Valetta Cannon says
Really love these suggestions, but funny you should say no to snacks. I actually started a tradition my predecessors never have at this library. As the new children's librarian (I started last July), I brainstormed about what additions/changes might bring in more kids, and came up with snacks. Most weeks, I surf Pinterest and the web and find both a craft (sometimes 2) and a snack that fit my story time theme. I have also gotten a lot of success out of expanding the age limits to include everyone, and have babies through teenagers show up sometimes. Not OK for everyone, but works great for me. The room we are in works fine for snacks - it did have old, already stained carpet, and will soon have tile, so no worries about messes, but only rarely do I include drinks, and if so, usually we do mini water bottles. A final suggestion I would like to throw out there - nearly a year ago I came up with the idea of having a "Favorites" theme for story time. The kids and parent often give me theme suggestions based on favorite interests, animals, etc. and I plan some of my story times using those themes.
When I use a child's theme, I recognize them by first name, both on the Facebook Story Time event page ("Come learn about Eve's favorite theme, Horses"), and in the actual story time's introduction. Two more fun things we like to do - I write down my regulars' birthdays and keep a stock of birthday hats on hand. We sing to the child and write their name on a hat if they show up to the story time nearest their birthday. Also, we have a welcome song we sing every week to start story time. It helps kids grasp onto something constant and familiar, and get comfortable more quickly.
Krystal Speed says
As the Children's Director at my church, I am designing a monthly Bible story time for our community. Great tips that I plan to incorporate!
Brenda Mann says
WONDERFUL article. I am sharing this with all the librarians I will have on a webinar about Storytime and Early Childhood Disorders. I am suggesting they print out this article and have it available for any parents/caregivers who attend storytime.
Jackie Hourani says
Thank you very much for your "DOS AND DON'TS OF STORY TIME (TIPS FROM A VOLUNTEER)'. What used to be down right manners has to be spelled out now. Respect starts at home. Children learn from their parents first, not the teacher.
Thank you!