Comments on: How to Help a Sore Loser Develop Good Sportsmanship

By: RK in Denver

RK in Denver — Wed, 07 Nov 2018 17:44:29 +0000

My brother, seven years older, taught me to play chess when I was eight. He never, not once, threw the game, or let me win. He said, in a very matter of fact way, Chess is hard--it's not supposed to be easy. Keep practicing and one day you will win and it will feel great! Until then, you're learning to play better. That said, he didn't go out of his way to crush me, but he didn't make it easy either. And the day I shocked him and captured his queen I still remember to this day almost fifty years later.

By: Erica

Erica — Sat, 20 Oct 2018 11:25:37 +0000

In reply to Diana. I'm so glad the tips have given you inspiration!

By: Diana

Diana — Fri, 19 Oct 2018 16:08:14 +0000

I absolutely enjoyed reading these tips! Great job at gathering other families' perspectives on the topic, too! I often don't play to avoid the reactions, but I now realize that I am not setting up a learning opportunity. What a shame on my part. No better time than the present, right? I'll start off with a co-op game per your recommendation!

By: Jill

Jill — Sun, 07 Oct 2018 09:32:43 +0000

I love the ideas in your post. I am a mother of two - now aged 22 and 24! I spent many hours "in the cupboard" (literally) with the 22 year old (boy) who HATED to lose when he was under 10 and would run crying to his room and hide in the cupboard. I would like to give my advice ... keep playing games ... keep modelling and praising good sporting behaviour ... keep congratulating the winners ... keep trying your hardest as an adult but look for handicapping strategies that make it 'fairer' for the younger players. The 22 year old is now a particularly well-rounded but competitive gamer and delightful young man (OK, I'm his mother!) Hang in there and delight in your kids growing up being good players in the game of life.

By: Erica

Erica — Tue, 25 Sep 2018 13:10:42 +0000

In reply to Ryan Billingsley. Yes, totally agree about the honesty part.

By: Ryan Billingsley

Ryan Billingsley — Mon, 24 Sep 2018 03:28:12 +0000

Great article! Thanks for all the good ideas. We recently wrote about the question "is it ever okay to lose on purpose to your kids" on our site and we decided on something similar to your "ask them straightforward if they want you to let them win advice." I think the honesty is key. Other than that, building up their confidence and growth mindset is of the utmost importance!